Friday, April 27, 2012

Back to really long. Its dark brown but I think I want the ombre effect again so I'll probably dye the ends.

Thursday, April 26, 2012

Im a great student because he is an awesome professor! Cant wait to take this course (The bible & gender) Fall 2012

Alex Clare - Too Close (OFFICIAL VIDEO)

I love this song!

Please Don't Love Me love life is non-existent right now. I'm in limbo between no-strings-attached Island and I don't want to be loved-land. I like this though. There are no titles and although I'm kind of still dealing with my ex and her sense of entitlement breeded from her egotistical, narcissistic disposition, I still feel more free. I remember saying a while back that if I was really busy, face in books and hands on work, that I would be able to let go easier...but the truth is, letting go is hard. 7 long years. Se-ven-uh! Very close to 8 yrs. I'm trying. I used to be so afraid of the picture that she would paint of me to the world once we truly let go of the relationship but now, I don't care. If people want to view her as a victim (which she is far from), then I'll let them. (Why is it the quiet, sneaky ones are always the "victim"?? Oh because no one sees what they do. All they see are others' quite opposite of quiet reactions. Oh well). I can no longer let anyone eat at my soul like a cancer. I can't let anyone put me back in that place; that scared little girl, bitter and detached. I won't. I can't. Right????

Progression-reflection: Moment of Honesty

Sometimes I miss God........then I realize that what I miss are my insecurities....comfort in my immaturity, and my debilitating ability to try to find a reason or excuse for everything that went right or wrong in my life by praising "god" or blaming the "devil." Now that I'm faced with the reality of taking most of the responsibility for the good and bad happenings in my life, sometimes I hate myself for leaving that blissful paradise called Ignorance. I say "most" because....well, there's Chance. However, that paradise can't compare to the paradise that I see ahead; full conscious reality. I think I'll like that place.

Beethoven & Beer

The grind....4am homework sessions, class at 10am, doc appt & work tomorrow night.

Wednesday, April 25, 2012

Hey all! Long time, no blog. I'll catch you all up later. Motivated, uber busy woman in route!

Friday, April 20, 2012

Its been a long day, as usual. Im on my way to work in this pic. I had school, paper, work, by my friend guy's house for shots after work. I didnt get off until 1130 pm and I'm just getting more assignments *sigh*...the usual. Whats keeping me going?? Ambition! Goodnight!

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Wednesday, April 18, 2012

Adastra Superyacht

Yahoo! News


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2012 Chevrolet Corvette ZR48 Speedboat

In love!!!!

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

My nephew is always doing something. "Tif, it wont let me login to"

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Kony Campaign wrap-up

I see the Kony 2012 "campaign" nonsense has died down. Any opinions on it now? Is your opinion of the campaign and Invisible Children any different than it was when you first heard about it?

I'll make this short. I expressed my skepticism when the Kony2012 campaign video went viral. The youtube video was propaganda-esque and anyone who has ever had an encounter with an aggressive salesman could see that in the video. Again, I just think people want to be in the know and feel as though they are well informed about world issues....and thats fine as long as youre well informed on the correct information...not misleading, pseudo-political/social truths televised to grab the attention of and play on the emotions of people who just want to be "in the know."

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Dont just read the title!

Obama's Refusal To Sign Anti-Discrimination Executive Order Slammed By LGBT Activists - The Huffington Post

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Monday, April 16, 2012

*mutes professor*

Meanwhile, in my psych class.................................

I'm tuning out my professor as I blog. I've been uploading a lot of pics lately because how I feel and what I think is kind of hard to put into words right now and I don't want to expose anyone to word vomit. Anyway, I'm sure this inability to express what I think/feel has everything to do with the fact that I innately over-analyze everything. Ever since I was a child, I felt the need to understand everything in depth. Even with school, my professor can mention something briefly just to make a point but I'll go home and research this "thing" just so I can make more sense of it. I'm obsessed with trying to make sense of everything but at the same time, I'm well aware that some things just don't make sense. Sometimes, I annoy myself. Then there is the feeling of being right about something that you wish you weren't right about. That's vague, I know. What's said about ignorance has to be true, it must be bliss. Sometimes I just wish my brain would shut up (if that makes any sense.) Ok, I feel the urge to ramble.............

*unmutes professor*

Sunday, April 15, 2012

Sunday night bliss

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My face looks fat. Oh well. I was laying dowb. Had a good nephew/aunt outing today :~)

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Clown activity! Lol

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Day at the park with my favorite b.o.y. This is my view

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This guy >>>>>

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Saturday, April 14, 2012

Just a thought....

Live, black erotic poetry would be amazing right now.....hmmm, the beginning to the perfect date*.

*see The Perfect Date blog entry

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Friday, April 13, 2012


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My fave frames at the moment. Vintage, of course

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The Perfect Date

Spoken word.Foggy darkness.B flat half note.Heat.Red wine.Red kisses.Deep brown skin.Deeper brown eyes.Curves.Seductive stares.Bitten lips.Immoral thoughts.Nervous laughter.Uncouth tongues.Unspoken desires.Temptation.Submission...

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Thursday, April 12, 2012

Dear Beautiful ...: Beauty 101: Tips for Healthy Skin


Dear Beautiful ...: Beauty 101: Tips for Healthy Skin: Jourdan Dunn I am in love with supermodel, Jourdan Dunn's skin! She has such a natural glow and smoothness to her skin which only enhan...

Wednesday, April 11, 2012

The best! So good for battering fish to fry. As for what I use on my sauteed salmon, I have to keep to myself ;~)

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Even better!

Twitter / CNN: George Zimmerman is in pol...

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George Zimmerman To Be Charged In Trayvon Martin Shooting: Report (UPDATE) - The Huffington Post

Still a long way to go though!

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The Peacock

Such a beautiful bird! The female peahen is pretty too but I love the colors of the male. They symbolize many things in many cultures, religions, literature etc around the world. I had a dream I was running from one last night (which I would never do) lol. The albino peacock is cool too!

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Tonights feature

The Boy in the Striped Pajamas (2008) - IMDb

Of course, I teared up at the end. Im uber sensitive about anything Holocaust related. Ive been like that ever since I first learned about the Holocaust as a child. Truly moving film.

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Tuesday, April 10, 2012

[I, Being Born a Woman]

I knew I felt my creative juices flowing. I mean, they are constantly flowing but I knew it was time for them to come into fruition. This was a little risque, even for me but I like it.Themes I had in mind for this project: art, sex, beauty, femininity, human sexuality, sensuality, and human nature. I'm pushing the envelope; embracing beauty in every form (yes, sexuality is beauty) and exploring it in all its glory.



[I, Being Born a Woman and Distressed]

I, being born a woman and distressed
By all the needs and notions of my kind,
Am urged by your propinquity to find
Your person fair, and feel a certain zest
To bear your body's weight upon my breast:
So subtly is the fume of life designed,
To clarify the pulse and cloud the mind,
And leave me once again undone, possessed.
Think not for this, however, the poor treason
Of my stout blood against my staggering brain,
I shall remember you with love, or season
My scorn wtih pity, -- let me make it plain:
I find this frenzy insufficient reason
For conversation when we meet again.

~Mina Loy      

Monday, April 9, 2012

Colorism: A Black against Black Reality

Colorism is a problematic issue in the AA community. For so long, "light" skin has been deemed beautiful while dark skin renders someone ugly or unattractive. Sayings like "light is right" or "she's pretty.....for a dark-skinned girl" are all common amongst those of all shades of black in regards to colorism. Not only that, but many lighter skinned males AND females have a false sense of superiority that's not only birthed by society but also supported by general society as well as parents, siblings, friends etc. The more harsh treatment of darker skinned blacks than lighter skinned blacks has been evident for years and years and years. One can only wonder if it (colorism) began with slavery* when the white slave owners separated what was known as "field niggers" (darker skinned blacks) from the "house niggers" (lighter skinned blacks.) Lighter skinned blacks worked in the houses on the plantations while the darker skinned blacks worked in the fields. Although both the darker skinned blacks and lighter skins blacks were raped by slave owners producing biracial children, the lighter skinned blacks were preferred by the whites.**

*No, I'm not generalizing in regards to slavery. I'm being specific here.Yes, I know that blacks were not the only race of slaves and whites were not the only race of slave owners.

*I left a lot of specifics out because I wanted to focus on one thing. I hate to do this, but I'll assume that readers know the REAL history of slavery (not what they teach you in school) as well as the genetic history of man.

Is this just history repeating itself? Is this why we hate our dark skin? Is this why we separate ourselves from one another according to skin color? Is this why lighter skinned blacks are revered? Is this why dark skinned blacks want "mixed" babies so bad?.

Ever since I was a child, I've witnessed this "war." I'm sure a lot of us deeper brown girls have experienced the reality of colorism. I know I have. I was never bullied or anything in school because of it but as I got older, I started to really understand what this separation was all about. In my teens this war finally had a name. In my late teens this war had a face. The faces were all black; all beautiful but so ignorant. Now that creeping out of my mid 20's into my late 20's I understand where all this self hatred is coming from. I can see why the little dark girl wants lighter skin and will do anything to get it. Even damage the beautiful dark skin that she already has. I understand why these cosmetic companies are making so much money from products that promise to lighten skin fast. I understand why some of our darker skinned black men don't want to father darker babies so they wont date/marry/have children with girls of their own deep brown color. I understand why the mixed baby is automatically gorgeous and the darker baby is just cute......for a dark skinned baby. I understand why people are lying about their race because mixed males and females are seen as exotic and highly sought after to produce "pretty" babies. I see it now and I hate it.

How do we fix this? How can we celebrate our dark skin without being told that we are just bitter, black women with a grudge against society? How can we celebrate our dark skin when not celebrating light skin makes you a "hater"..??

I love my brown skin and I'll celebrate it no matter what. I dare you to celebrate with me. Will you?

See my style featured here ----->

My style was featured again on another website. Check it out here. Thanks to Embrace You Mag!!

Thrift trip

Got this beauty thrifting. Only $5. Great vintage purse!

P.S. This has become much more than a hobby

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"The Woman Who Wasnt There" airing soon!

ID slates “The Woman Who Wasn’t There” to air in April » Realscreen

I Cant wait to see this!

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I'm in love with this. Especially the string arrangement. Fell in love with it the first time I heard it & even more when I played it.

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I love my ballcap. I need to get more!

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Sunday, April 8, 2012

Our new oil paint canvas!

This is why I love thrifting. My babe (cant say gf...cant say ex....i know. Complicated huh?) Spotted this at the thrift store yesterday & showed it to me. Of course we both love it and yes, the price tag doesnt lie. It was $3. I think its a 10x13

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Extremely Loud & Incredibly Close (2011) - IMDb

Beyond amazing movie! Definitely in my top 20

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Saturday, April 7, 2012

Just Jotting...

(I'm literally just jotting. Excuse me if my thoughts seem all over the place)

I love Love. It's a beautiful concept. I understand it's depth; it's complicity.

"Love is cursed by monogamy"

When I say I understand Love's depth, I mean it. Love is usually thought of as one man and one woman who love each other enough to reproduce then skip off holding hands into the sunset. That idea of love, I understand and respect but I really think that only touches Love's surface. I was in a monogamous relationship, which I think is the right relationship type for me BUT I totally understand Love on other levels. For example, polyamorous relationships or polygamy.

If having more than one mate/wife/husband makes people happy, why not? The "right" way to love for you may not be the right way to love for someone else. Remember, truth is subjective; as is Love. I don't like the moral standard of Love being based on, via comparison to, just heterosexual, monogamous relationships. Everyone isn't the same so it's ridiculous to expect everyone to love the same. That's like saying "ok you have blonde hair. I have black hair. My eyes are brown but yours are blue. I like skating and you hate it. I'm an introvert but you're extremely social. Those differences are ok but Love is supposed to be just............ ". No! if humans can be different in that many ways, why can't we be different when it comes to our ideas of Love....??

To be cont'd

Look of The Day: 4/6/2012 & 4/7/2012

Look #1 4/6/2012

I wore this to run errands for the first half of the day. This was before the midday drinking with my bestie. Oh how I love animal print!

What I'm wearing:
-animal print cardigan
-vintage salmon blouse
-black F21 denim jeans
-black gold chain loafers
-black Nine West faux leather bag

Look #2 4/7/2012

I had a couple errands to run today. I went by my mothers house and of course, my usual weekend thrift trip.

What I'm wearing:
-snakeskin blouse
-denim shorts
-vintage woven tawny purse
-gold Old Navy sandals
-vintage sunglasses

Bread and Roses (2000) - IMDb

Great movie!

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Friday, April 6, 2012

Tipsy photoshoot! Lol

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Midday drinking again with the bestie!

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Look of the Day 4/5/2012

I had great plans for today. I was going to go to this outdoor, concert type thing that's featured every thursday in my hometown for a couple months in spring downtown. Well, Mother Nature had other plans; rain and hail. (Which explains why my porch looks a complete mess!) I'm not complaining but I really wanted to go see the live music today. Oh well, there's always next week. I ended up hooking up with my bff for wine and girl talk. We also went to one of our guy friends house as well. This is what I wore today. As usual, I went for something comfy, not too "girly" but stylish.

What I'm wearing
-Blue "denim" chambray mens Express shirt
- American Eagle boot cut jeans
-tawny, chunky heel platforms from Urban Outfitters
- faux leather, animal print bag from Target
-army fatigue ball cap
-vintage inspired cat-eye glasses

Thursday, April 5, 2012

I need this necklace ahora! I bet I can figure out how to make it. Hmmm

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Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Free car wash! Thank you universe. Every bird in Spartanburg county must have gotten together and decided to shit on my car.

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I used to be in love with Chictopia and I still think it's a great community. When I first joined, I felt like the site celebrated style not necessarily just fashion. It felt like I was a part of a community of regular people with great style from all around the world. I was lucky enough to be selected as a Forum Advisor for the site and I noticed that a lot of people were complaining in the forums about fashion being celebrated more than style. I haven't been there in a while because I started to feel like it became too much of a popularity contest. I'm sure I'm not the only one who noticed this. Seems like school all over again. Like the HS cheerleader who wore all the "hip" styles that you couldn't really figure out if that was really her style or if she was just trying to be noticed for being trendy. The focus seemed to shift from style to trendy fashion. Some of the most stylish people that are a part of the community seemed to take a back seat to the people who followed ALL the fashion trends. I may revisit the community, but for now I think I'll just document here.

I don't normally upload grainy pics but I must document my progress. I was doing some exercising the other week and I like what I see. Still Team No Soda. All water & juice, more fish, and I'm taking my daily vitamins! Go me! Lol

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Brown is Beautiful

I cannot explain my love for really dark skin (men and women). It's so beautiful and warm. These women are beautiful!

Beautiful Families!